So..where were we?

In case you have been wondering, I- (Ica) have not really been writing of late. Its been almost three months, I can't even remember the last time I sat in front of some form of device (mobile or desktop) to actually write. Well, needless to say something life changing has happened to me, in case you missed it, Paul and I had a baby! 

So yes, all those cliche lines of what your mom and dad used to say about having a baby-happened, is actually still happening to us. Its been a roller coaster of emotions these past few months. For one thing, I became hypertensive when I reached my seventh month of pregnancy. My OB had me take a leave from work, take a butt load of medicines and essentially rest until I gave birth. I had to monitor my blood pressure,which would reach an alarming 180/110 and I wouldn't feel a thing! Which is kind of scary when you think about it. 

I hated being alone at home, while Paul left for work in the evening. For the last few weeks leading to giving birth, I would literally be alone in the house and I hated it. It's funny because I had a relatively easy time up until I reached my third trimester, when I hit a BP reading of 140 and it wouldn't come down anymore and I ended up in the hospital, to make things worse it happened on the week of my birthday. So now that my relatively "easy" pregnancy was non existent, I was left to a miserable rest of my pregnancy, which was essentially the whole month of July.

Because I was hypertensive my OB wanted to have me induced for labor, which is what happened, on August 4, we went to the hospital and as luck would have it, I didn't have a particularly easy delivery either. I went through labor and my God! It's as painful as they say it is, dysmenorrhea times 1000! I honestly don't know why anyone would want to go through that again, hats off to moms with children (emphasis on the "ren"). 

Honestly it was really scary, it was like an episode of a medical drama, when it was time to push, the baby wouldn't go down, I was looking at a monitor to my left and I could see my blood pressure had shot to 170/110 and when I looked at the fetal monitor at my right, I could see that the baby was going into fetal distress, it was honestly, one of the scariest moments of my life. My OB then decided to push through with an emergency Caesarean Section. While they were getting Paul's signature for the procedure, I was honestly in denial as everything was happening but like I said, it was like an episode of a medical drama but instead of being the audience who was at the edge of their seat, I was the helpless patient lying on the OR table. 

I remember not feeling anything (because of the anesthesia of course) but I could feel the tugging, like my skin was being pulled in both directions, then I heard the OB saying that it was "cord coil" (umbilical cord wrapped around the baby's neck) which was why he wouldn't go down. 

I saw my son as they brought him to the baby area, I could hear the pediatrician and other nurses working on him. I heard them counting his fingers and toes and being the paranoid mom I was just waiting to hear 'four' or 'six' but thank God they were all five. 

I remember saying a genuine thanks to my OB before I went I to a weird wake-sleep state. Just a few hours later I woke up shaking violently in the recovery room. When I called the nurse she said it was just the effect of the anesthesia. While my arms were shaking violently, my legs felt like tree trunks, they were so heavy and I couldn't lift them. 

Now it was baby out at 9:26PM, by around 2:00AM I was already on Facebook chatting with my in laws. After a while I was brought to the hospital room where Paul, my mom and sister were waiting. In the morning our son Luke Stephen was brought in the room and life has not been the same since.

Luke will be two months in a few days (I know! Where did the time go?!) 

I've told Paul that "pregnant Ica" was different from "regular Ica" and now I guess "Mommy Ica" is different from the Ica that I was. I still don't how to reconcile them both into just "one Ica" but I guess time will have to play a role in that. 

Right now I'm in this weird state of wanting to get back to my old routine, work, movies, events, the blog but as I said things will never be the same again now that we have a baby in the picture. It's less than a month before my maternity leave ends and I can't imagine leaving Luke, right now just thinking about it brings me to tears. 

So going back to the question "Where were we?" -actually I'm not really sure, as I am typing this on my iPad, Luke is breast feeding (don't ask how, but it is possible) I'll definitely work hard to get back to the old Ica but I'll definitely work harder towards the new Ica and hopefully that version of me is better and stronger, we'll definitely need it. 

Subterrania Sessions: Getting to know Luis G. Katigbak

Our worn and weary copy of Luis Katigbak's 'The King of Nothing to do'
Apparently our niece turned the cover into a canvas for her 'art'.

A few years ago my sister-in-law gifted Paul with a compilation of essays by award-winning fictionist Luis Joaquin G. Katigbak. Paul excitedly told me how the author was a high school batchmate of Ate Anne's (Paul's sister). I read a few essays and was both entertained and amused, I didn't get to finish the book and it made it's way up our book shelf to sit among our other treasured paperbacks.

Fast forward to having our days revolve around work and the blog, the blog being divided into event coverage, photoshoots and writing about music, movies, books and you probably know whatever else that makes it to our little spot in cyberspace. 

Last January 31, 2016, we were originally planning to see "The Big Short" in the cinema but we got a message from Ate Anne asking if we wanted to go to a benefit gig at Route 196. We saw the event poster and was thrilled to find out that the line up of performers was nothing short of legends in the OPM Scene. Further exchange with Ate revealed that this was a benefit gig for Luis Katigbak, who is currently battling complications with diabetes, the very same writer whose collection of essays I (naively) put up on our shelf.

I grabbed a chair and like a 5 year old toddler got up to reach the book and I simply continued where I left off, an old photo of me and my siblings still marking the page. Reading it again, was just like catching up with an old friend and his crazy stories and thoughts about life in general. I have never had the pleasure of meeting Luis, but reading his essays, you sort of get an idea of the 'man behind the pen' or at least that side of him that he shared on paper. 

You wouldn't want to make him angry, he can get pretty creative with a box of matches and a bottle of alcohol (I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of that) and I couldn't help but laugh about one story of him and his friends getting lost on their way to Malate. These essays were written in the early 2000, when there was no navigational apps like Waze, to make sure you are not kidnapped in Tondo. 

Since Ate had to be at work early Monday morning, you can say that by all intents and purposes Paul and I stood as her proxy. I really didn't know what to expect at the gig, it was going to be an older crowd for sure (which suits me just fine since no one would be calling me 'Ate Ica'). 

Just like Tom's Story's album launch, which took place the day before, Route 196 was filled to the brim with people and it seemed to be a weird déjà vu. When we opened the door to a packed bar, it was that weird déjà vu feeling again but instead of young millennials, it was your Titos and Titas on a Sunday night out. 

We got to hear the legendary cackle of Dong Abay of Yano as he performed the classic 'Banal na Aso, Santong Kabayo' and that's definitely one for the books! 

Ciudad performed next and I really liked their set as it was reminiscent of early 2000 pop-rock. I enjoyed the harmonies and the easy going melodies...hold that thought (opens Spotify, follows Ciudad and listens to a few tunes)...there :) I hope to see more of them soon and can anyone point me to where to get a copy of their physical CDs? #CDsNotDead

I don't think I've ever seen a bouncer in Route 196 which is relatively a small bar but then there he was, big in built and sature, firm in how he got the different artists to and from the stage safety, without being drowned in arms, hands and requests for selfies. 

If you asked me, it was a good call to get the bouncer, because sure enough, the crowd grew in number, just like in 'The Multiplication of the Loaves' only this time, instead of bread, they were middle aged fan boys and girls who were pushing and shoving to get the best view possible. I had Paul make sure he got a good spot to take photos and he was pretty much up to his elbows with...well other elbows, while I was pushed back to a far corner of the bar, literally by the door. 

Sure enough, as soon as Ely walked to the stage, the crowd cheered and brought out their cellphones, I suddenly felt like I was in a concert, where half the audience seemed to be making a photo & video documentary. Being 4'11 (and 3/4) I was happy to watch from the screens of their cellphones. All I could see were shoulders and heads after all :p 

These budding concert photographers and videographers...AKA eager 'Titos and Titas of Manila' were not only taking photos and videos but they were also messaging friends (probably making them jealous) of what they were missing, just like any good old friend would.

When they covered David Bowie's 'Starman' my head exploded since I just re-watched 'The Martian' on DVD and it was in the movie. It was one of those 'worlds collide' moments.  

Looking around, you can easily see that the who's who in the music industry was present that night, as well as other High School batchmates of Ate who marveled as to how Paul had grown so big. Apparently they all used to go up to party in the family house in Antipolo and during that time Paul was but a wee little lad. 

I was wondering how come all of these music icons were here tonight, 3/4 of The Eraserheads-wow! 

That's something! A simple visit to 'The King of nothing to do' the compilation of essays we had, revealed that Luis wrote for PULP and MTV Ink, and is currently Associate Editor for Esquire and yes, worked on that legendary The Eraserheads issue, which was always sold out in book stores when it came out (that bit on Esquire, I found out on Luis's Twitter).

Luis writes in his introduction for 'King-' that most of the material he wrote for these magazines (interviews, event coverage, reviews) -yes, things I (try) to write on the blog! would be perhaps 'complied for a future collection dedicated to music related matters'. Does anyone know if this transpired? I gotta get my hands on that, it would be a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow for me. (I am a Padawan, in search of a Jedi Master).

*The material that made it's way to 'King-' were from his column in the Manila Bulletin as well as contributions for MEGA and Cosmo. 

I've never had any formal training in writing (you can probably tell from my inconsistent use of punctuation marks or my frequent use of run-on-sentences, something that would give my old English teachers an aneurysm) if you might ask, I'm actually a graduate of Nursing and a board passer (I know, things didn't really pan out there). So now, I work as a Real Time Analyst in the BPO Industry during weekdays and write on the blog and contribute to other websites on weekends and whatever spare time I get. I know that to improve in my craft (AKA 'writing') I'd have to read a lot and while Steohen King, Haruhi Murakami, a YA Novel here and there-and yes even romance novels can keep the cogs turning, reading actual pieces worthy to be published in print in leading newspapers and magazines would make me a better 'writer'-or so the theory goes. 

Luis has a whole chapter on writing in 'King-' :) 

My copy of 'The Earaserheads' Esquire issue. I almost had to bribe the lady at National Book Store to secure me a copy. 

Sometimes there are too many PRs and reviews to be posted that I have the tendency to be sloppy with my work and just click on the 'Publish' button just to cross it out of my to-do list. I don't get paid for what I do on the blog but I do it anyways, because I love it. Which is why I can't help but admire Luis who actually got to make a living out of his writing, something I'd give an arm for. He succeeded in his profession during a time where the quality of your writing mattered more than your number of followers or how good you look in an overhead-selfie shot. Luis is the real deal and even if I haven't met him yet, I'm happy to have known him through his essays and I'm happy to now have a go-to source of inspiration whenever I'd run into a blank wall. 

Ever since I've started reading 'King-' Paul says there is a different style to my writing, I don't know if he's just saying that because we're married but I have definitely been more conscious of what I put down on the blog and have also tried to re-read to correct for grammar lapses as well as typos. 

Get well soon Luis! I wish I would have known you and your work sooner, I'm sure most of my published posts would have come out better than they did. 

All hail to 'The King of Nothing to do!' 

The King and my tools of the trade. I still do my writing with actual pens, any nice black pen will do - kahit Panda pa yan. A Faber Castel pen for writing titles. The blue hand is actually a bookmark. 

Taking on Jessica Jones

As a self proclaimed writer, I always like challenging myself, you know, really writing something. I feel alive when the words are quickly forming in my head and rushing to get either on paper or online. There are times when I just need to write for the sake of it, just to get a post up, just because I need to. So when my Managing Editor assigned me to write about the new Marvel-Netflix series Jessica Jones, I was both excited and a bit apprehensive.

Excited, because I love every opportunity to get to put on my writing hat on and really get the juices flowing. Apprehensive because the series is critically acclaimed with every critic writing about it. People I look up to are either already done with the series or are currently watching it and have been raving about it on social media. So yes, writing about my opinions was a bit nerve wrecking.

I didn't want to come across as naive or silly in my thoughts and opinions of the series and I guess that's what had me staring at a black paper longer than usual.

In the end, once inspiration hit, the words came and I was able to fill up one page, then another, and another and before I knew it, I was done!

You can check out my Jessica Jones write up on www.flipgeeks.com 

or you can click on the link here.     

Get the Fire Going with the #KitKatBreakMovement

Have a Break Have a Kit Kat or better yet have a whole lot of Kit Kat!
Photo by PCheng Photography 

Paul and I are a team in life as man and wife and in also maintaining this blog. I often joke to people that our car Hon-Chan is our eldest child while this blog is our second (hopefully the third one will come with a birth certificate). 

An acquaintance of mine once told me that our talents (mine in writing and Paul in photography) is truly a marriage and I guess that's why the blog can be considered as one of our babies :) 

It's not easy doing what we do, having a job that pays the bills and feeds our bodies and pursuing our passions to feed our souls. 

Sometimes when we are itching to work on a project or a blog post, our minds are working on overdrive but our bodies are calling for the comfort of our beds. You know the saying 'the mind is willing but the body is not' well it's the same exact thing. 

There are times where we're working on a project and suddenly we become all too human and crave for rest instead. It's times like these where we just need a break to get the fire going again and based on my experience making sure to take a Kit Kat break can do wonders and even unlock skills you will surely need. 

Paul shooting away at an event coverage. 

For Paul he wants to unlock the skill of 360 degree visualization so that he already knows the where to go, what to shoot and the best angles to shoot from. As a photographer every moment is important and capturing the moment is all that matters. 

It can get tiring when you are shooting or covering an event, or even post processing countless photos but taking a much needed Kit Kat break will definitely help you unlock skills and the strength needed to become a better photographer.      

As for me (Ica) I hate to admit it but there are times when I get writer's block, so much so that even writing a blog post is like doing math homework! (and Math and I have such a complicated relationship). 

I love writing and I never ever want to feel that it is a chore or something that I need to do. I want to want to do it. I want to want to write. 

So when I feel my body becoming tired or when I feel writer's block creeping in I take a much needed Kit Kat break to unlock the skill of Creativity so I can keep on writing and when I say writing I mean real writing and not just rewriting news to post but really looking within me and around me for that creativity and inspiration I need to become a better writer than I was yesterday. 

Writing away on my trust laptop. Photo by the husband
 (c) PCheng Photography 

In life there are times when we will get tired and uninspired but that doesn't mean you have to stop and give up. Unlocking much needed skills and becoming a better you is just a Kit Kat Break away! #KitKatBreakMovement         

Ready to get back up!

In case you guys didn't know I had a challenging (I won't say bad) last quarter of 2013 - refer to this post here. Despite the set backs I've regained my footing and am now ready to get back up. 

In case you didn't notice I haven't been blogging or posting stuff online as much as I used to. Well this is mostly due to my unexpected change in plans. But that doesn't mean that I haven't been writing - I actually have been writing old school style in a worn out steno notebook, making sure I don't forget my thoughts and reflections; just waiting for the time when I would be ready to sit in front of my good-old laptop and start typing in a frenzied state and I guess that time is now. 

Even before I started blogging I've always had the 'itch' of wanting to write and wanting to get my thoughts across. I guess that's the frustrated writer in me wanting to break free from its prison. I'm just lucky that I got to hone my writing skills when I was in College by being part of the school newspaper. So even if I lack the formal training one requires to call themselves a professional writer I still get by as a blogger and freelance writer. 

So now I'm finally adjusted and I'm finally ready to regain my place in this obscure realm known as cyberspace. Because even if I lost myself, stumbled and fell I was still able to get right back up. 

It doesn't matter that it took time or that I still feel the pain at times; what matters is that I got right back up and I'm ready to be me again.          

The Last Rain

(Saigo no Ame)

The Last Rain 

As the last rains come pouring down 

And  the warmth of summer presses on 

My umbrella sits outside the door 

With the last rain drops falling to the floor

I remember the cool kisses of rain 

Thinking it will be a long time before I am kissed again 

I cherish the cool embrace of the rain 

Thinking it will be a long time before I am held in it's cool embrace again

Throughout summer's heat

Never will I face defeat 

For I will be here waiting 

waiting...

Waiting for the rains to come cascading 

To take me in kisses sweet and cold 

And hold me in an embrace oh so cold 

I like it just like that 

To be right here under the rain 

But now the last rain has come 

And you are long and gone 

But I will be waiting 

Through the warm summer wind 

Through the hot summer days 

And the still summer nights 

I will be waiting 

For the first drops of rain to come again 

Until then, here my umbrella sits 

With the last drops of rain